When Old Pain Comes Again

dark riverDepend upon this— that at least once a month,
Old pain will rise again, float
Feverishly surface in river of your mind,
Suppress and sink the health you’ve found,
Drown you in old ways of being.
 
Great danger is to see this as merely a sign of weakness.
Return of pain is not always a nervous breakdown.
Stay upon the forward path, have confidence
Though valley floods and tidal waves may rain down.
Perhaps the backward slide
Is but a sign of approaching breakthrough,
Darkness before the dawn,
Surprise of sunrise triumph yet to come.
 
When false structures that have ruled your life
Finally dissolve, collapse into dark pools—
Don’t expect they won’t fight back.
Be strong, hold on to authentic warrior spirit.
Your river has already changed, current changes still….
There will be a lifetime rowing, doubting,
Grieving, arguing, dancing on the barge.
It’s all what the Soul swims toward.
All will be well.  You are always in God’s hands.

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