Some feelings never let go,
Like the endless hunger for love—
A world, a universe I do not understand…
Lost as I am in longing, beyond control,
Beyond reason, in grasping touches, piercing
Defenses, overpowers senses… shameless, stimulating.
Only in those awful moments when I return to
Shadowy reality of the world I walk—
Enchantment fades: all that remains are
Painful desire and indescribable restlessness;
Emptiness without presence.
Doubts are a gust of wind compared to
Majestic storm that lies within, raging deep inside.
On outside, a crafted exterior,
A pretense of normalcy,
Indifferent to whispered breath of kisses.
Resisting tender arms embrace desperate hunger.
Even as I walk away, I cannot remove
My eyes. Thoughts turn and turn again to
Glance upon tender air, possessed by
Absurd conviction that everything is possible.
Filled with dreams and visions, even
Deserted streets of my life appear populated with
Expectation, anticipation, hope.
I walk out upon open plaza, notice flock of birds
Congregate in center of the square, covered with
Blanket of white feathers blowing in the breeze, silently.
Pigeons part to let me pass, without flying away.
I move forward, as pigeons break ranks in front,
Re-form behind as together, we hear peal of
Church bells tolling midnight hour. I pause,
Stranded in oceans of silvery. cooing birds, in midst of the
Most marvelous, magical night of my life—
Knowing this moment has been waiting for me
Since before I was born… this divine encounter,
This open heart of love that lingers into dark.